Hair

I've had a head full of hair since the day I was born. It has been long, mostly. I only remember it being short three or four times in my life and never maintaining the short length, always growing it back. 

Sometimes, a girl just gets an itch for something different. And, lets face it, when you have long hair and tell a hairstylist you don't care what she does, you're ready for a change, of course she's going to go short. You don't, after all, go get your hair cut and expect it to be longer. 

So, here's the new cut. People say they like it. Verdict is still out for me. I'm sure I'll grow it back out. That's the nice thing about hair, it always grows back. :) 

In Hopes to Calm

Max has been in our family for almost three years. 

He is perfect to us; we feel about him the way I imagine most parents feel about heir kids. He has been our "kid." He listens (usually). He cuddles. He gives hugs. Kisses. High fives. He can "pound it." Roll over. Lay down. He listens when we tell him to go to his bedroom. He loves us. Unconditionally. And we love him. 

He's almost three and we've not yet had him fixed. At one point, we had considered breeding him, as he's a purebred German shepherd and we thought we may want more one day. 

He's a big dog. He's hyper. He doesn't know his own size. He thinks he's a lap dog. 

So, in light of our news of baby.... We have decided to get him fixed as the vet said this should calm him down a little. 

I can only picture him being wonderful with baby, but if this will help bring him down a notch, that will be good. Surgery is scheduled for the middle of June! We'll see how this goes! :)

The Sweetest Sound

Today. 

Wednesday, May 15, 2013 

Lucas & I heard the sweetest thing. 

A heart beat. :) 

Tears streamed down my face. Lucas was beaming from ear to ear. His eyes sparkling. We heard our sweet, perfect, little babies heartbeat. We are ecstatic. We are grateful. We are blessed. I won't lie: we are also nervous and anxious. We want to get past twelve weeks. We want to see the little babe on an ultra sound. 

But, one ever knows. Ever, really. 

So, we will enjoy day by day. And we will pray. And we will smile. We may not stop smiling and praying. 

Already, we love this babe so much. So, so much. 

Routines

I'm kind of a person of routine, I guess. I've never really thought about it. I think it just happens that way ... I can usually roll with the punches if it doesn't follow my routine.

So what even caused me to consider routines? Max. :)

My diggity dog is very much a dog of routine. Most nights, he starts out by trying to steal his dads spot in bed while Lucas brushes his teeth. Then he gets kicked out of his spot on te bed and usually heads to his food/water dish followed by his dads spot on the couch where he sleeps for the night. When the alarm goes off, he joins us in bed until Lucas gets up, in which he then steals his spot. Lucas goes outside to start the work truck, and Max jumps over me to get out to the kitchen so he can go out with his dad. When they come back in, he jumps over the top of me again and goes back to his dads spot and goes back to sleep. Like clock work. Monday thru Friday.

Smart, silly, sweet diggity dog.

Sometimes...

Sometimes it's days like these that are the toughest to get through without people seeing the tears.

When you go to church and see all the adorable little kids dressed in their Easter best. When every other Facebook post is of proud parents posting pictures of their children with their Easter baskets.

It's days like these, especially, that you think what if and why is it so difficult?

It's not just days like these though, really, it's also days driving home from work when the mind wanders or when people ask you when or if you will have children.

I guess, sometimes, honestly, it's every day.

Sometimes I try to trick my mind into letting me think that I could be perfectly happy without. That maybe it isn't in His plans and that I can love up and spoil all my nieces [& nephews if they come along] but then there's days like these that I know I couldn't.

I am so blessed and you will never hear me say any differently, so sometimes this desire feels so selfish to me. I am blessed with a wonderful husband, a dog full of kisses, proud parents, an amazing sister, brother and extended family and friends. A goddaughter who I could not adore anymore than I already do. A good job. A nice place to live. A vehicle to drive. I have all these things and yet I'm wanting more.

I try everyday to be happy and to serve others; look for ways to help or put a smile on someone's face and, for the most part, I succeed, so sometimes I just wonder if I'm missing something. Am I doing something wrong? Or, is He just using me in a different way than I imagined for myself? I try focusing on the task at hand and live one day at a time but I can never help but wonder what does lie ahead for us.

And then, at the end of the day, reviewing all my thoughts, I am reminded that everything does happen for a reason and, I just know, that some day, I will hold a sweet, perfect little baby of my own. And, until that day comes, I'll have my sweet little goddaughter Ella Mae to love up and who could be sad about that?! :)

Old Wicker Basket

I've found a practical, cute use for an old wicker basket that had been collecting dust in our storage room. It will be the seasonal outdoor welcoming basket. Here's what I've came up with so far.

TMNT: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

It's crazy to me that Teddy is already 6 years old. It doesn't seem that long ago that we were sitting at the Sutherland Hall front desk watching Sesame Street or whatever struck his interest on YouTube.

In true Sarah form, the party theme did not disappoint. I can only take credit for assembling her pizza cake idea - all the rest was her crazy skills. :)

Happy Birthday Dad!!

Wishing my dad a very happy birthday today!

I'm a pretty lucky girl to have a dad as great as you. You have taught me so much by the examples you have set. You have a work ethic that cannot be beat and a heart of gold. You have always been there for me and come to my rescue whenever I call (when the garbage disposal isn't working, when I put the car in the ditch in a snowstorm, the list goes on and on...). When you talk. I listen. I respect you. And look up to. I am grateful for you. I love you.

Wishing you a year of happiness and health and many, many more birthdays to come.

Photo Shoot

Auntie may have got carried away...

Nah! Baby is too cute to not take a million photos!

Matching!

It doesn't really get any cuter than Ella! :)

Auntie has a matching one. Thanks Ella!

January: Where Have You Gone?

I'm having a hard time believing that its the 27th of January already.

Today, Lucas & I finally un-decorated the Christmas tree and put all the Christmas stuff away. Now, my house feels bare. The only thing that made the evening tolerable (it's always a sad day when the Christmas things get put away) was that it was a snowy blizzard outside! :)

This week I am planning to spruce up the house with Valentine's Day decor! :)

More to come this week!

Crafting

So, I was browsing Etsy to find something to use my gift certificate on from my wonderful sister and I came across some felt hearts used as decorations... Here's my own little creations based on those...

Photo Shoot

No words necessary. :)

Close To My Heart, Never Far From My Mind

I think about my Papa often.

A few times a day, to be honest.

I think about what he would have said in a variety of situations if he was still with us. It would be just the right thing to say at just the right time and it would include hope and positivity.

I think about the BIG smile that would be on his face if he could have met Ella.

I think about how if he was still with us, he would still make daily trips to the barn & help whenever he could. He would still call my mom every single morning and ask her what my dad was up to for the day.

He would wake up well before Nana, but would be quiet and let her sleep; he would check his blood sugar, make coffee, eat breakfast, read the paper and watch the news. If anyone was there to hear him, he would say he needed to check the obituaries to see if he lived another day. :)

He would shake his head in disbelief at the thought of the possibility of the Mosinee Mill closing. He would say "that's too bad" and then go into a story or two of his memories there.

He would love Nana unconditionally; he would be so proud of his kids and their spouses; he would tell everyone all about his grandchildren and great grandchildren.

He would still pick up his long-time friend Joe who no longer drives every Saturday night and they would go to church.

He and Nana would still go to the grocery store together, but use separate carts as well as pay separately (we never really will understand it, but it was them).

I think about him often.

Many things remind me of him on a daily basis.

I think about one of the last things he said to me - she's good - and I hold it dear to my heart.

I think about all the time I got to spend with him and I smile. And, I am forever grateful for being blessed with so many memories. I take comfort in knowing he never really is that far away in memory and what wonderful memories to have.

Gift Giving

I love gifting. I love the challenge of finding the perfect gift for people; or taking their wish list ideas and putting my own creative spin on what else to include or how to present it. With that being said, whether you love gift giving or struggle with it - I introduce you to Birch Box. For Christmas this year, I was gifted a Birch Box from one of my best friends & I love it! :)

These photos are from my second box. :)

New Years Resolutions

2013: A new year. A new beginning. A fresh start.

So how will I go about this?

1. Lose weight {a little cliche, I know}
Because who doesn't want to be healthier?
And, my doctor said losing a few pounds may increase our chances of getting pregnant.
So, Lucas & I have decided to commit to this for 2013 - a new & improved, healthier lifestyle. Eating better, being more active & enjoying life.
I have re-enrolled in Weight Watchers (I stopped last year when I found out I was expecting) with my mom & aunt by my side and will be taking healthy habits home to Lucas.
Lucas & I have agreed to a more active lifestyle - for starters, we have taken up & ENJOY cross country skiing.

2. Work Less
Now, in saying this, you must know, I love what I do. So, so much. But, 2012 was a rough work year & I need to find that balance this year. We are in a much better place and I need to take this opportunity to focus a little more on me and my family. So, while I want this, I also want to be better at my job. I want to be meet the professional goals I have made for myself for 2013 & I want happy residents & happy employees.

3. Play More
I want to get out and experience more of what life has to offer. Lucas & I want to try and get some where new at least every other month - a mini vacation, a weekend away, etc. Already, we are planning a ski trip - see how this trip ties into the first two resolutions. :) We do have pretty busy lives (who doesn't?) and need to be sure we are always taking time to spend with each other. Any cool little get away ideas for us? Please share!!

4. Have a Baby
I'm not sure this qualifies as a resolution, but really, this is what we want. Hands down. We are hoping the top three resolutions will help lead us to this one here. I try so much to be content with all I have as I really am blessed beyond belief with a wonderful family, amazing friends, a job I love, a roof over my head and the list goes on & on; but, to be honest: we want resolution #4 more than anything.

And the best is yet to come...

Love,
Heidi :)